5/6/2015 Christ this has so much dialog when you start a new game. It just goes on and on and on... Also the file select screen looks almost exactly like Mario's... hmmm. Once you finally get past all that and actually start playing the game, it's an immediate disappointment. The first level (hub level I think?) looks like the sort of thing I see 12 year-olds posting online when they show off "this cool new level I just made!" - in other words - it's shit. I have no idea what I'm doing, let's be fair - it's in Japanese, but straight ahead of me is a beach (I'm guessing, it borders water but looks utter shit) and under the water there are things! (One thing, maybe two) So that seems like a good place to go right? Wrong, my little fairy companion blathers something when I try and enter the water and I can't do it. OK well I'll climb this (shit) rock then.. Nope, just another fairy speech. Running out of things to do I notice there's a pink thing on top of the tree, so I climb the tree and collect it. Success! I got a thing! Nothing obvious happens. I'm starting to get bored at this point, eventually I notice there are three (shit) 'paths' leading out of this area, the first two I try are blocked by a door and large kangaroo/dragon thing, but the third (which is clearly a dead-end) actually turns out to be the entrance to the first level, hoorah. Everything looks like a crappy Mario 64 in here, the braindead enemies are dispatched by jumping on top of them, how unique. Across a rubbish bridge there's a treasure chest containing a ... ... grey cylinder! Good stuff /s. Now that things are heating up I hop, skip and jump my way across some moving platforms and come face to face with the first boss. He runs around after me like an idiot and I run around trying to get behind him like an idiot until I eventually realize that the grey thing I found is some kind of gun. Bang bang he dead. His corpse erupts in a huge and drawn out explosion which is totally ridiculous and over the top, and by far the best thing in the entire game so far. If you're less than five years old, fluent in Japanese, and love Mario games but want something a bit shitter, this may be the game for you.